ARCHBISHOP DOLAN PAYED ABUSING PRIESTS TO LEAVE CHURCH

According to CNN and a bit of discovery in the Catholic Church's bankruptcy case in Milwaukee, our own Archbishop Dolan approved a program of $20K payoffs to priests leaving the church for abusing children.

On Thursday, the archdiocese confirmed that it had offered payoffs to abusive priests as "the most expedient and cost-effective way to have offenders laicized or removed from the priesthood."

Having an abuser volunteer to go through the process known as laicization - formally leaving the priesthood - "was faster and less expensive. It made sense to try and move these men out of the priesthood as quickly as possible," the archdiocese said in a statement.

Lovely. How expedient. The abuser cash-out. I guess there were enough of them to push the Milwaukee church into BANKRUPTCY. Yeah, right, the Catholic Church is bankrupt. Sell a few bejewelled gewgaws and diadems and the like. Have a damn tag sale. Hell, donate all future bingo proceeds to a fun.

One Catholic church source defended the payment plan on Thursday, saying, “You either pay them to leave and give them money for food and clothes and shelter as they look for a job or you have a drawn out trial that could take years.”

“Wouldn’t that be preferable than to keep them as priests and paying their salaries,” the source, who would agree to speak only anonymously. “And wouldn’t it be better than a trial and to have victims testifying and cross examined?”

Er, better for WHOM? Exactly whom would that be better for? Can someone clue me in? Laicized indeed.

Update: DOLAY DENIES, DENIES, DENIES

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